Updated: Aug 28
Do you feel like you are lonely sometimes, no matter how many people are around you? Do you feel unfulfilled? Do you feel like you are searching for something more?
No one knows you better than you know yourself. So, no one can love you more than you love yourself. You can love yourself deep inside, in all those places that no one else even knows exists.
This is how you learn a deep self-love. It is through self-acceptance. By seeing all of yourself, seeing your flaws, and loving yourself anyway.
It is by finding completion within yourself, and not expecting any of your loved ones to complete you. That isn't their job. You aren't a half searching for another half to complete you. You are a beautiful, whole person who can be complimented by other people.
When we stop looking for love outside, and learn to find it inside, we become stronger, happier and more whole people.
Your shadow self is all of the qualities that you deny or fear in yourself. It is the things that you think are 'bad' about yourself and try to hide. However, those qualities are all still there, no matter how much we try to suppress them.
Learning to do shadow work, and to have some pretty radical acceptance of the qualities that we don't like in ourselves can help us learn to transform our mindset and love ourselves more deeply.
Changing our expectations
A lot of times, we walk around as these half-healed shells of people, expecting someone else to complete us. But we fail to realize that it isn't our parents, our partners, our friends or our children's responsibility to complete us.
It is our responsibility to complete us.
It is our responsibility to do the self-work.
No one can do the work for you. No one can go inside your heart and heal the places that keep breaking. Your unhealed wounds are things that can only be healed by you.
Once you stop expecting others to complete you, then you can love both yourselves and others more. You can stop resenting them for not being 'enough' for you. You can stop resenting them for not being able to meet your needs or read your mind.
Caring for you is a full time job.
But it is YOUR full time job. That is why self-care is so important. The more you make time for self-care and the things that are important to you, the happier and more fulfilled you will become.
As we let go of our expectations about the way that relationships are supposed to be, then our relationships will become more fulfilling.
Relationships aren't meant to complete you. They are meant to add to an already complete person. The more complete you are in yourself, the more you can enjoy the company of other people.
Take some time
Take some time and go inward. Explore and discover yourself. Find your shadow. Find your light. Learn to balance the two of these within you.
Some things that can help you with your introspection, self-love, and creating a more positive mindset are:
Any of these practices can help you to deepen your communication with your inner self, so that you can practice deeper self-love every day.
I wish you a bright and blessed day today, my lovelies. Be well!