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You May Say I'm a Dreamer



I have a confession to make. I am a pie-in-the-sky dreamer. I believe in true love. I believe that you really can do anything that you set your mind to. I believe in all sorts of magical possibilities to life.


I am an idealist.


If you knew me for any length of time, you would probably realize this. Although I suffer from depression, I still do usually think the glass is half full. But the thing is, there is always the possibility to fill the glass back up. I don't know why people don't bring that up.


Life is in a constant state of flux and change. We are constantly growing, evolving and bettering ourselves. At least people who are in the personal development space. Which everyone is, I think, at least a little bit.


We all have wants, needs and desires. We all have secret dreams down inside our hearts. We all have something that we say to ourselves, "Wouldn't it be cool if..."


Maybe it is fitting into a smaller pair of jeans, or getting a promotion at work. Or maybe you sit down sometimes late at night and ponder your place in the cosmos and wonder what you can do to make the world a better place for everyone in it.


I love when those late night ponderings turn into late night talks about spirituality, about the way things go, about all the potential for greatness that everyone has deep inside themselves.


We used to go to Denny's every Tuesday night for coffee, cigarettes, and tarot readings. That was back before we were old enough to go to bars, but those were probably some of the best conversations I ever had in my life. I was really sad when Denny's kicked us out and said we couldn't read cards there anymore.


Eventually I stopped reading cards altogether, after too many middle aged women asked me what they were supposed to do when they were cheating on their husbands. Make a choice.


I think that is how dreams die. Little by little, piece by piece, until you are that middle aged woman yourself looking for something to make you feel alive again after the kids are grown enough that they don't need you every minute.


Do bored housewives all cheat, shop or drink?


I found yoga instead. And with that, a way back to a sense of myself. A sense of spirituality and purpose. I put Buddha's up around my house, lit some incense, and scream my affirmations at the top of my lungs when no one is home.


Everything is always working out for me!


I am so grateful for my abundant life!


Really, everything is working out, just the way I want it to. I just hope that my life as it is, my life as a writer, can continue indefinitely and become sustainable. But patience, grasshopper.


Sure, there are unfulfilled dreams out there still beckoning me. But things are pretty good right now. I have a lot to be grateful for. Every day, I write it in my gratitude journal. When you are grateful for what you have, you start to see just how beautiful and abundant life can really be.


Both gratitude and affirmations are amazing tools to change your mindset and change your life. They help you focus on the positive, and rewire your brain for happiness.


Some of the things I dream for the future are having my daughter living closer or being able to see her more often, being able to travel more, and of finding spiritual enlightenment. Right now, I am focusing on my spiritual path. I feel like if I get that 'right' then everything else will come together.


Yes, I am a dreamer. I want to be the Buddha sitting under the bodhi tree. I want that moment of total clarity. I want to really understand the meaning of life, and all that is. I want it to make sense. I want to be able to dissolve into complete oneness that lasts forever. The boundless drop in the boundless ocean.


Change your mindset, change your life. Change your heart, and you change everything.


What do you dream of, lovelies? What is it that sets your heart on fire? What keeps you up late at night thinking when you look at the stars? Are you like me, just thinking about how small we are?

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