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Why Millenial Mom?

"When you know your why, it makes your what more impactful." (Michael Jr.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why I Started Blogging as Millennial Mom

From the time I was in Elementary school, I always wanted to help other people.  I was the kid who would make friends with the new kid, sit with someone who was sitting alone, or comfort the kid who fell on the playground.  As a teen, my parents actually tried to dissuade me from my altruism, telling me that I should stop worrying so much about other people and just think about myself.  But I couldn't.

Why?

I always chose kindness because I have always known what it feels like to be truly and utterly alone.  Growing up as the child of Narcissists (a term I wouldn't become aware of for decades), I learned that love was conditional, something to be earned and not given freely.  I didn't want others to feel so starved for love and kindness as I had felt all of my life.  I didn't want anyone else to suffer the way that I had suffered - not if I could possibly help it.

I want to create a safe space for others, where they can feel seen, heard and understood.  Where they don't feel like they have to hide who they are for fear of being judged.  I want to help people learn to find self-acceptance that leads into self-confidence.

I spent so much of my life hiding who I truly am out of a deep sense of shame that I never want another human being to have to go through that.  All people are worthy of love, of kindness, of compassion just by virtue of being who they are.  No one should have to change to make someone else love them.  You should be able to be yourself - all of yourself - and be accepted.

As women especially, often we are expected to put our own needs last.  We are supposed to help our parents, our partners and our kids feel loved and cared for.  But who is left to love and care for us?  Often, I see mothers putting their needs so far to the bottom of the to-do list that their needs are never met at all.  That isn't living.  That is just surviving.

You deserve to do more than survive.  You deserve to live.  You deserve to thrive.

If you aren't able to do that in your current life circumstances, it is time to start asking yourself some difficult questions about what in your life needs to change.  It may be your priorities, your to-do list, your relationships, or the expectations you have of yourself.

There is this modern myth that mothers can be superwomen - that we can do and be and have it all.  But that's all it is.  A myth.  And often the perpetrators of this myth are other women, especially influencers who are supposedly trying to inspire us.  But seeing someone else who is supposedly doing so much better doesn't make you feel inspired, mostly, it just makes you feel bad about yourself.

Still, I believe that you can life a beautiful, authentic life that is full of joy and happiness.  But to do that, you have to choose your priorities carefully, and manage the expectations of those around you.  Don't say yes when you feel like saying no.  Make sure to show yourself the same love and care that you show to others, and spend just as much time taking care of yourself as you do taking care of them.  That's how you create balance in life.

I started this site to help other women realize that they aren't alone in feeling unsatisfied with the status quo.  It doesn't make you a bad person or a bad mother to have gotten burned out by doing too much for too long.  It just makes you human.

It is my hope that by sharing my story, my humanity, with all of you that I can provide you some solace and help you realize that you aren't alone.  I want to help you feel seen and heard.  I want you to believe in yourself even when no one else does, and keep looking for solutions even when it seems that there are none.

You can heal your life.  I believe in you!

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